By Julie Hyland
I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in July 2013 at the age of 37. I lost a lot of weight, mostly muscle. Looking back at pics, I looked so sickly but I had so much going on at that time I didn’t notice. I was moving to another state, my father passed away and my son was also moving to a different state, all within a two-month period.
After getting diagnosed, I had a very strong mindset that I wasn’t going to let this disease control me, and I was going to show the world I could do even more now with type 1 than I could do before. I have always worked out and watched what I ate, so I was ready to kick diabetes butt. Well, I gained my muscle and weight back and kept that mindset for about 5 years.
Then, I let it get to me. The feeling like I suck when my sugars were high. The fear when my sugars went low. The fear of going to bed and dropping low. The constant stressing and worrying about what to eat, what to drink and what to dose. The anger when I would attempt to work out and drop low. The feeling of being stupid because you can’t figure out this disease. So I stopped working out, and I started eating whatever I felt like. But most of all, I drank.
I have always loved alcohol. It was my best friend. It got me through sad times, happy times, stressed times, anxiety, fear. It was my life. It was there for me…so I thought. I began to drink so much, I now know it was a way of numbing my hatred for this disease. The same disease I said I wouldn’t let affect me. If I was drunk or drinking, I was able to ignore a million thoughts of this disease. This disease I got like winning a bad luck lottery.
Because I was always drinking, I stopped noticing how I looked. I mean, I noticed my clothes not fitting and how I looked in the mirror. But because I would just numb myself more, I was able to overlook it. All it took was one video I saw of me getting out of the pool. I couldn’t believe how I looked. I also started doing yoga at that time and I was in my house thank God, but in one of the positions, I had to lift my stomach up in order to do it…what the h*ll?! Never in my life had I experienced anything like this.
That day was May 18, 2020. I decided that day I was done drinking and punishing myself for something I had no control over. I quit drinking. I started walking. I got a treadmill and a weight rack, bench and weights. I started working out and eating better.
Because I wasn’t drunk and hungover all the time, I felt great and it began to change how I looked at everything. The scale doesn’t show a huge amount of weight loss, but I’ve lost so far 7 inches off of my stomach. I have gone from a size 12 jeans to a size 6. I have started running and I love it. I dabbled in running about 15 years ago but never could run for long distances and always felt like death. When I started in July 2020 I couldn’t run for even 15 seconds. I can now run 3 miles and not feel like death. I will be running my first 5k at the end of May, which is also my one-year of sobriety month. I am nowhere near where I want to be but I’m so happy and proud of what I’ve accomplished so far. After my 5k, I want to do a 10k and then a half-marathon and so on.
If I have any advice about this disease it’s “don’t be so hard on yourself”.
I also wish there would be more information out there about adults getting type 1 and more people talking about it. When I first got diagnosed there was barely any information about adults getting diagnosed. I started a YouTube channel in hopes to help other adults and it’s also a good way for me to get all my worries, stresses and journey out to everyone. I stopped making videos when I was in my funk, but I’ve started back up now. Documenting my sobriety and my running journey and how it all affects my blood sugar. If you are interested and want to follow me along in my progress. You can subscribe on YouTube at imtype.01.